Sickness - Voice over for video opera

translated by Pascale Giorgi

I wasn’t feeling like I belong to the big picture of the world

Everything

As soon as I touched it,

was stained

and ruined forever.

I couldn’t find any comfort in mankind

I saw no truth in other people's smiles

and neither in mine

They were funeral masks,

Monuments to fear.

looking at them

I wonder if they didn’t think that

in a moment

they would disappear

Like others before them

Like everyone.

I would have given to anybody my free will

so long as he would take me off

that sensation

I wonder to get sick

and no longer have to fight

Something invisible was preventing me from happiness

God should have made a mistake with me

He must had forgotten a piece

I would like to be chained

Or among nuns in a monastery

Safe from mistakes and from world’s falsehood

The necessary fiction to live was intolerable

I desired to be a plant, any kind of plant

Still, with no defense

I would have swiped with flowers

that cannot escape from being caught

that are intended to die on a whim

I went far from anything

but it wasn’t enough

And at that time I found you

It was the time to completely abandon me

I let you come inside me

And let you deprive me not only of the shell that I became

but that you ate my past

till leaving me

out of the time and of the space

With no more right

to have borders

I let the abyss to bring me away

Like dirty water

I wanted to take off from me the weight\burden of filling me with anything

And I became a monster

Made of white and fragile bones

A dust residue

at the bottom of a deep pit

With no way out

VIDEO

whith English subtitles